If you’re losing customers and can’t point to a single moment where things went wrong, this episode explains why. In the Revenue Rewired Podcast Ep 47, Sarah and I tackle how customers actually leave. Not because of one big failure, but because small points of friction quietly pile up until one last inconvenience becomes the deal breaker.
The key takeaway is simple. Customers don’t need to be delighted. They need things to work the way they expect, without extra effort. Extra clicks, repeated questions, too many follow-ups, or too many choices create fatigue. When meeting expectations stops being consistent, customers don’t complain. They leave.
If you want to understand where churn really comes from and how to remove friction without overcomplicating your process, listen to the full episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Why Customer Churn Almost Never Feels Dramatic
Most leaders expect churn to come with a warning sign. A complaint. A tense call. A pricing objection.
That’s rarely how it happens.
Sarah and I talk about how customers usually leave quietly. Not because of one big failure, but because the experience slowly becomes frustrating.
It’s the extra step they didn’t expect.
The form they already filled out once (or more).
The follow-up that arrives too early or too often.
None of these feels serious enough to complain about. But together, they create fatigue. And eventually, customers decide it’s not worth the effort anymore.
Big P vs Little p: Preferences Explained Simply
One of the ideas that frames this entire conversation comes from The Effortless Experience.
Big P preferences are what customers want to accomplish. Little p preferences are how easy or painful it feels to get there.
For example, a customer might want:
- A service completed
- A quote delivered
- A contract signed
- A problem resolved
Those are the big goals.
But their experience is shaped by the little things:
- How many steps it takes
- Whether they have to repeat themselves
- How long they wait for responses
- How often they’re interrupted or asked for input
You can solve the main problem and still lose the customer if the process feels like work.
Why “Delighting Customers” Is Often the Wrong Goal
This part surprises a lot of teams.
There’s a long-standing belief that going above and beyond is what creates loyalty. In reality, most customers don’t want to be wowed. They want things to work the way they expect.
Meeting expectations consistently is what keeps customers. Not exceeding them occasionally.
When companies chase delight, they often:
- Add more touchpoints
- Introduce more tools
- Send more emails
- Ask for feedback too early
All of that adds effort. And effort is what customers are trying to avoid.
More Choice Usually Creates More Friction
Internally, offering more options feels customer-friendly. In practice, it often does the opposite.
If you give customers multiple ways to contact you but can’t support them equally well, the experience degrades. Slow responses feel careless. Inconsistent communication feels disorganized.
Ease comes from clarity. Customers want to know what to do next and feel confident it will work.
How to Actually Find the Friction in Your Business
Most leadership teams believe their experience is fine because customers aren’t complaining. That’s a risky assumption.
Customers usually don’t explain why they leave. They just leave.
The most effective exercise I recommend is simple. Map your customer journey from start to finish and look at it honestly from the customer’s point of view.
Ask yourself:
- How many steps does this really take?
- Where are we asking for unnecessary effort?
- Where are we solving problems too early or too late?
If you walked into your own business as a new customer, would it feel easy?
That answer is usually uncomfortable. And incredibly useful.
Questions CROs Are Asking Right Now
Q: What does “the straw that broke the customer’s back” actually mean?
A: It’s the final small frustration that pushes a customer to leave after many others went unresolved.
Q: Why don’t customers tell us what’s wrong before they churn?
A: Because pushing back takes effort. Leaving feels easier.
Q: Does this mean delight doesn’t matter?
A: Delight doesn’t compensate for friction. If expectations aren’t met, it doesn’t stick.
Q: How can we find friction without annoying customers with surveys?
A: Experience your own process. Secret shop your business. That alone reveals most issues.
Q: What’s the fastest way to reduce churn?
A: Remove unnecessary steps from sales, onboarding, and support.
Where This Perspective Comes From
This conversation isn’t theoretical.
I’ve built companies, advised leadership teams, and watched customers walk away over things that felt minor internally. Alongside Sarah Shepard, COO of StringCan Interactive, I see this pattern repeatedly across mid-market B2B organizations.
Teams focus on growth initiatives while friction quietly erodes trust.
Retention problems aren’t loud. They’re subtle.
Customers don’t leave because you failed in a big, obvious way.
They leave because you made things harder than they expected.
If you’re ready to remove friction from your revenue engine, connect with our team.
